强奸视频

By Ang猫le Sancho Passe

You have a concern about your child鈥檚 care and education, how do you handle it?

When Paul picks up Sofia (4 months), he鈥檚 surprised to see she鈥檚 sucking on a pacifier. He and his wife Molly had communicated to her teacher that they didn鈥檛 want Sofia to use pacifiers. Flustered, he takes the pacifier out of Sofia鈥檚 mouth and leaves without saying a word. At home, Paul and Molly discuss the situation. Did the staff give Sofia the pacifier because she was crying too much and that was the only way to console her? Did the teachers disregard their wishes? Or did they just forget?

Sandra is worried that Mason (3.5 years) does not want to go to preschool any more. He used to calmly say good bye, but now he protests loudly and cries. The teacher says he is fine, just a little 鈥渢ouchy鈥�. Sandra is increasingly nervous. Is there something going on at school that she is not being told about?

These stories have a common theme. Parents have concerns and they don鈥檛 know how to talk with their child鈥檚 teachers without being emotional. They may feel anger towards the provider, guilt over wondering if they are leaving their child in a good place, embarrassment about confronting the expert teacher, and confusion about what to say and when. But often, not communicating leads to more negative emotions and concerns.

Here are some tips to address concerns with teachers. Unless it is an urgent safety issue, it is OK not to react immediately and take some time to collect your thoughts.

Before the meeting:

• Ask yourself the questions: 鈥淲hat do I want to see happen?鈥� and 鈥淲hy is it important for my child?鈥� Write down your ideas if that helps you think them through.
• Arrange a time to talk face to face (or a phone call if in person isn鈥檛 possible.) Try not to use email to present your concerns. It鈥檚 best to have a conversation so you and the teacher can exchange your feelings and ideas at the same time.

During the conversation:

• State your feelings and ideas, using I statements: 鈥淵esterday, when I picked up Sofia, she had a pacifier in her mouth. I鈥檓 concerned because we had written that we do not want her to have a pacifier. I鈥檇 like to talk about how it happened and find a solution with you鈥�.
• Listen to the teacher鈥檚 response: 鈥淭he teacher was a substitute.鈥�
• Clarify your questions: 鈥淗ow are substitutes informed about parents鈥� wishes and children鈥檚 needs?鈥�
• Discuss several options with the teacher stating her ideas too. 鈥淲hat solutions can we find together?鈥�
• Agree on the solution that makes the most sense to you and the teacher.
• Plan a follow up meeting within a week to review the situation.

So how did it go for Sofia and Mason鈥檚 parents?

A few days later, Paul and Molly called the teacher and requested an appointment. During the meeting, they shared they felt strongly about not giving Sofia pacifiers. The teacher apologized and explained what happened: A new assistant teacher had given Sofia the pacifier without consulting Sofia鈥檚 chart. They all agreed that this was a mistake. Paul and Molly asked if there was a policy to avoid this kind of situation. The teacher offered to put in place a policy that all staff would review parents鈥� preferences weekly. Paul and Molly felt reassured but wanted some confirmation that the policy would be followed. They planned to talk again in two weeks to check in.

Sandra was a bit nervous, but she decided to ask for a formal meeting with the teacher. At the meeting she told the teacher that she didn鈥檛 understand the meaning of 鈥渢ouchy鈥� and wanted to talk about it. The teacher apologized for using casual language. She explained why she was not worried: 鈥淚t is common for preschoolers to go through a new phase of separation anxiety, even after they seem to have adjusted well. They still feel very dependent on their parents, and are learning about independence at the same time. They protest when parents leave, but recover quickly and play well the rest of the session. The important part is to notice Mason鈥檚 behavior at the end of the day: does he seem happy?鈥� Sandra agreed that he was and she was reassured by the teacher鈥檚 knowledge of child development. They planned to continue to check in weekly to assess how Mason was progressing.

Quality child care centers follow 强奸视频鈥檚 Code of Ethical Conduct which recognizes the primary importance of families in children鈥檚 development. Most of the time life goes along smoothly. Occasionally it takes extra effort to be on the same page. Parents have the right and responsibility to bring up their concerns. Children learn more and are happier when their families and teachers collaborate for their care and education.
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Ang猫le Sancho Passe is the author of Is Everybody Ready for Kindergarten? and other titles. She is an education consultant and past member of the 强奸视频 governing board. She lives in Minneapolis.听